Books for kids, teens, & those who are young at heart

Category: Travel (Page 1 of 14)

When Grief Unexpectedly Hits (and it Shows up in Your Writing)

The thing about grief is that each person experiences it differently, and it encompasses many different emotions. It can change over time, but it can also revert back to that fresh grief in unexpected moments. And it never goes away.

Recently, I was driving two of my kiddos to a travel soccer game. They were both in the back of the minivan, my 10-year-old reading and the 13-year-old playing on his phone. I had the radio tuned to the local alternative rock station that plays 90s music on the weekends, my favorite kind of music. The sun was out, the kids weren’t fighting, and I was in a good mood.

My sister Kylene on the left and me on the right standing next to each other. We were both teenagers at the time, her slightly taller than me, even though I was 3 years older than her.
Kylene (left) and Katie (right) around the ages when we were singing “Dumb” in the car together.

Then, the song “Dumb” by Nirvana came on, and I was transported back to another car ride, one that was more than 20 years ago. It was a similarly nice day, and I was on the way to play beach volleyball with some friends. Instead of my kids as companions, I had my sister Kylene. She loved to sing and had a beautiful voice, and she wasn’t afraid to sing loudly in front of others. Not like me, I kept my tone-deaf voice to the confines of the shower and my car.

So when “Dumb” came on the radio, we were both singing along, Kylene considerably louder than I was. The song got to the end where Kurt Cobain, the lead singer, repeats the line “I think I’m dumb” over and over again. Only, that’s not what Kylene sang. She was belting out “African dough” over and over again. I cracked up, tears rolling down my cheeks, because she had no idea that she was singing the wrong lyrics.

Of course, being the amazing older sister that I am (and also a teenager at the time), I not-so-nicely pointed out that she was singing the wrong lyrics and her lyrics made absolutely no sense. When we got to the beach, I told all our friends of her mistake, and it became a running joke every time we heard that song. For the rest of her life…which turned out not to be that much longer because she passed away when she was only 16. (I’ve written about this before in “Still Mourning Kylene 20 years Later.”)

Fast forward to hearing “Dumb” in the minivan with my kids, and I once again had tears rolling down my cheeks. I had my sunglasses on and my kids were paying no attention to me. I didn’t want to upset them or have to answer any questions they might have asked, so I kept them oblivious to my silent tears. We’ve talk about Kylene, and they know it was a very hard thing to go through, but in that moment, I wanted to be alone in my feelings. When it got to the end of the song, I quietly sang “African dough” instead of the correct lyrics, a little smile breaking out on my face.

Hearing that song and having that punch of a memory hit me, it made me miss my sister so much. It brought up fresh grief mixed in with all the old grief. The sadness that my kids will never get to meet their Auntie Kylene; the weird emptiness of her not being here anymore, even when I have no idea what she would be like now or what our relationship would be like; and the loss of all the things that she never got to be and do, whatever those things might have been. There was also the humor and fondness of the memory.

Even now, all these many years later, the grief can be overwhelming and complicated and hard and unique. It’s no wonder themes of grief often pop up in my writing. There’s my upper middle grade book Witch Test where Liza is being bullied by her ex-best friend, which brings up all sorts of feelings about her late mother. And my YA Hamlet retelling Only Dark Edges where Delta is haunted by the ghost of her sister and spirals into a deep depression of grief. And my work-in-progress picture book about a little girl, whose sister named Winnie recently passed away, goes looking for Winnie-the-Pooh in the woods.

I’ve always said one of the reasons I write is to try and make sense of the world. Kylene’s death will never make sense to me. But writing about it helps me sort out my feelings. And when I publish works about grief, my hope is that it will help kids who experience grief realize they are not alone in their feelings.

The Magic of a Highlights Foundation Writing Retreat

Quick reminder that there are just a couple of days left to get 10% my entire catalogue of books using code NOVEMBER10. Just go to the Purchase Books page and I’ll ship them directly to you. All books are signed with an option to personalize, and all purchases come with fun book swag!

For those of you who have been followers of my blog for awhile, you may remember the last time I went to the Highlights Foundation or a writing retreat and wrote “Highlights Foundation Unworkshop: A Little Creepy, A Lot Productive.” My writing friend Katlyn Duncan and I enjoyed it so much, we scheduled one for the following fall.

Then COVID happened and we had to put the trip on hold, but we finally made back early this month! And it was amazing!!! Yes, amazing with three exclamation points.

With this retreat scheduled for early November and me just starting a draft of my latest young adult novel, all the stars aligned for me to attempt National Novel Writing Month. NaNoWriMo (for short) occurs in November and a bunch of writers attempt to draft a book (i.e. write 50,000 words) in 30 days. It’s an intense experience, and one I was not in a position to attempt in recent years.

This year, I stayed in Cooper’s Cottage, which was a bright and airy cabin full of Floyd Cooper’s illustrations and with a view of the hiking path. It was not haunted, though one of the other writers I was on the retreat with stayed in my old cabin, and (spoiler alert) that one is still haunted. I actually didn’t write much in my cabin because I was retreating with three other writers this year and we mostly wrote in common spaces or in one of the other cabins (but not the haunted one!).

As I said, it was an amazing trip, and I highly recommend a Highlights retreat for all of you creative types. I wrote a ton of words and set myself up for successfully completing my NaNoWriMo challenge (as of November 28 when I’m writing this, I’m at 47, 250 words for the month and on track to finish on time). There’s much to be said of having everything taken care of for you so you have the brain space to only think of writing.

As a teaser for what I’m working on, I composed this poem in the Highlights word garden. As you can see, it’s kind of an intense story, but I’m really pleased with how it’s coming out. Though there will be a ton of revisions to come.

dark and light

scream within

the storm

Katie L. Carroll

My retreat mates are all vloggers, so you can check out their videos about the experience below. I kind of hate making videos myself, so I’ll be sticking to this old blog for now.

Heading to PLA in Nashville and Exciting Book Teasers

This week I’m off to Nashville for the Public Library Association conference. I’m super excited for Stacey Abrams’s keynote (and sad that I’ll have to leave before Samantha Bee’s). Of course, I’m excited for the reception for the Indie Author Project winners. A bunch of us have connected online and it’ll be fun to meet at the event. I was hoping to leave my winter coat behind, but it’s going to be just as cold in Nashville as CT…oh well.

You can now purchase copies of ELIXIR BOUND, winner of Best YA for the Connecticut Author Project, with the award badge on it!

I’ve been working really hard on ELIXIR SAVED to get it ready for pre-order…just copyedits to go. I know I’ve been promising a cover reveal, but it’s really going to happen in March (I even created a video for it). Big thanks to Susan Tait Porcaro for once again creating a gorgeous image to represent my book.

There is also an old book of mine that is getting a second life this year! So keep an eye out for news on that…gold star for anyone who guesses what book I’m talking about.

CT Authors Trail Event & Little Free Library Summer Reading Update

I’ve been having so much fun stopping by Little Free Libraries all summer long and leaving copies of ELIXIR BOUND with a code for an ARC of the upcoming second book in the Elixir series, ELIXIR SAVED. I have a pictures to share, but first an event announcement!

My stop on the CT Authors Trail is coming up on Monday, August 5 at 6:00 pm at the Voluntown Public Library, which is located at 107 Main Street, Vountown, CT 06384. In addition to learning about the inspiration behind my books, there will be games, writing prompts, signed books, photo ops, and maybe a sneak peek at ELIXIR SAVED (if I’m feeling brave!).

And now for the summer reading fun I’ve been having with Little Free Libraries and the Elixir series. States visited so far include Connecticut (of course), Virginia, and Vermont, with one on the way in New York. I’ve loved checking out the different themes people and organizations have come up with for their little libraries. We’ve encountered The Lorax, space, and a couple of beachy ones.

The boys have enjoyed picking up a book at a few of our stops as well! I think my favorite one so far was a bright yellow one, not because it looked particularly special but because it was at the soccer field dedicated in memory of my sister, Kylene.

I’ve been posting pictures on all my social media accounts (find me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter), so you can follow along as I drop off the rest. You can also get the latest updates on my progress on ELIXIR SAVED. I finally finished the big revision I was working on (about a month late), and now I’m getting the final scenes written and the three POVs organized so I can send it out to my beta readers. I’ll also be contacted my cover artist soon to get working on that. Yay! I’ve tentatively set a November 2019 release date, so get ready for another journey into the world of the Elixir!

Upcoming Author Events 2019

It’s been a quiet year for author events so far (which is okay with me, given the lousy weather in New England in the winter and the busy fall I had). I’ve also been a bit quiet here on the blog this year because I’ve been busy writing, writing, writing. But I’m excited to announce two events for this year with hopefully more to come.

The first one is only a couple of weeks away! I’ll be attending the Local Authors Fest at the Public Library of New London on Saturday, March 23 from 11:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. There will be a whopping 50 authors in attendance! Grabbed a signed book, enter the raffle, take a photo with an author, and listen to a select group of authors speak about their books and writing journeys. There will be children’s books and adult books in all types of genres, so something for everyone. I’ll have copies of my YA fantasy ELIXIR BOUNDand my middle grade adventure PIRATE ISLAND, and some book swag too.

I’m please to also announce that I’ve been selected as one of the authors in this year’s Connecticut Authors Trail. I’ll be at the Voluntown Public Library on Monday, August 5 at 6:00 p.m. to talk about my writing journey and PIRATE ISLAND. I’ll have more details about this event soon and CT Authors Trail finale event at Mohegan Sun in September.

If any educators and librarians are interested in booking me for a writing workshop or talk, I have spots open for this year as well. Check out my author visitspage for more details or email me at KatieLCarroll @ yahoo.com (minus the spaces).

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